Episode 44: Jenn Uren on Your Mom Team

you Dec 07, 2021
Jenn Uren know Your Mom Team

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One of my favorite gadgets is That Bug Bite Thing

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This is a transcript of the This Mom Knows Podcast - Episode - 44

Jennifer Uren
As a mompreneur, one of the biggest lies, we believe, is that we have to do it all ourselves. We believe it, and then we run ourselves ragged trying to actually do it all. The truth is, you can do it all, just not by yourself. You need a mom team. Think about it. Behind every mom, there's a team. It is true. And it can be more obvious for high profile moms with their personal assistants and their nannies. But look closely, and you will see that every mom has a team. Even you.

But what is a mom team and who is on it? Well, every team is comprised of people, systems, and tools that support the mission of that team. And as a mompreneur, you have made it your mission to build a business without compromising your role as mom. You are already familiar, probably with business tools that make you more effective. Maybe things like Calendly, or zoom. But how do you do this as a mom? Well, a mom team is made up of the people, the systems, and the tools that will support you as mom and mompreneur. They're going to give you time, and space, and skill, and energy to do your thing. They're going to keep you focused on your priorities. And they're going to even make you look good, and keep you balanced.

Now, before you start panicking, and thinking that you have to go out and recruit people, for your team, I have some great news. You already have your first team members - your family! Your spouse, and your kids are key players on this team. Not only are they your cheerleaders, they're also your closest allies. They're the ones who share your space. And they can be part of keeping home running smoothly. They can help remind you of your goals. And they can notice things about you that you might not be able to recognize yourself like that you forgot to eat lunch and that might be why you're feeling off. And trust me, kids are brutally honest. And so if you tell them that your goal is to do X and you're not working on it, they will let you know. So you've got the beginning of a team. But you've got some other members on your team, too. Team members that you may not have even considered. Do you have someone who maintains your lawn? That person is a member of your team. They're on your mom team? Have you ever ordered pizza for delivery? Well, you utilized your Mom Team -the pizza parlor and the delivery man. Do you ever use Amazon Prime? Mom Team! You're not shopping, you're not going to pick something up. Groceries delivered? Same thing - you got it! Mom team. Every one of these people is part of your team.

So who do you need on your team? Well take some time to observe what you do. Where you need help and identify the roles or jobs, you know where you could add some members to your team. And think about this. Where you need help might not be something that you lack skill in. It might be something you're quite capable of doing, but you don't enjoy it or it's not the best use of your time. Then get creative. Not too long ago, I was speaking to a group of moms and one of the moms raised her hand and she was sharing how she works part time from home. She has young children, and by the time they go to bed, that is her first opportunity to clean the house. She's exhausted, she is overwhelmed - and all she wants to do is crawl into bed. She said she has the budget to hire a housekeeper and she's thought about doing it. But it always felt like a failure to her to do so. See how she had bought into that lie that she had to do it all herself?

She didn't realize it but she was actually asking me if a housekeeper belonged on her mom team. So I responded I encouraged her that hiring someone to do something is a legitimate form of delegation. And we've talked about this with Emily Morgan on the episode on delegation. So go back and listen to that if you could use some help in knowing what to delegate and how. But I told her if her budget allowed it, she had permission to do that. It was the opposite of failure. In fact, it was successfully meeting a need. A need that her family had to have a clean house and a need she had, because she simply lacked the energy and ability to do it when the opportunity arose.

So then the mom next to her raised her hand and said, but what if your budget doesn't allow for it. So I encouraged her to swap something with another mom. And by the end of our time together, these two moms were making arrangements to trade cleaning for meal prep, with the added bonus of a playdate and a coffee with another mom. They were building their mom teams.

Now, people are part of the team. But systems are also part of your team too. So how do you how you do laundry, how you meal plan, how you make space, and time for working, how you celebrate things in your family. These all are things that require a good system to execute it well. And these systems will play into how your your time is used. Now, for the mom, for anybody really, time is a limited resource, and therefore our most valuable asset that we have as mompreneurs. And we say it's a limited resource. It's the one resource we all have the same amount of and it's how we use it, that is going to make a difference. So we want to use it well. Right? So what systems do, you need to tighten up? Now if you're not sure where to start, personally, I suggest that you start with laundry or meal planning, because ultimately you need them both. There is something magical about laundry being under control that is extremely life giving. Well, life giving might be a stretch, but I do know that the piles are life draining. So I'm just gonna use some logic and assume that not having piles is life giving. But those are both things that are underpinnings to our being mom and mompreneur. And when those things are running well, we have the bandwidth to focus on other things. So start with one of those two systems. And if you need help with starting with laundry, I've got some resources on the website for how I started with laundry as well.

So we have people on our team, we have systems on our team, but we also have tools and gadgets that are part of our mom team. They can be from the super simple to the very complex. But as long as they are making life easier and working for us, then they are a valuable part of your team. Now it'll it only takes an episode or two for you to know that I love a good gadget. It's something I'm asking all of my guests at the end what their favorite time saving gadget, system, or tool is, and I'm always looking out for things that are going to make life easier. Now, there are a lot of cool gadgets out there that make big bold promises, and some of them stand behind their claims. But others, they're just a lot of hot air. One of my favorite gadgets right now is called that bug bite thing. And it is so simple. And it is super effective. Totally worth having several because you can keep one the car, one in your purse, you know, one in the back porch, whatever. But this is a gadget that definitely backed up on its promise. And it's part of my mom team because I can help my kids not be bothered by these bug bites. And so then they don't fuss and cry as much and they play more. And that keeps us all in a better place.

So it's a great tool on my Mom Team, it's a simple one. But my avocado slicer, it didn't hold up to the promises it made. So things are gonna you know, some gadgets are great, some are not. Some tools and gadgets really need to be there and some just don't belong. But as you think about the tools and gadgets on your team, really make sure that they do save you time and effort. And that's a personal question only you can answer. But here's an example. If you like popcorn, do you have to have an external machine? A dedicated popcorn popper? Does that make it worth it? So are you saving time and effort? Now maybe because you can make your popcorn, plug it in and not have to babysit it. It'll do it on its own. But you do have to store the tool. You have to get it out when you want to use it. You have to clean it each and every time you use it. But maybe, maybe it's worth it because you make popcorn all the time and you've got it down to a system. But maybe you just make it occasionally and so is a saucepan and a lid just as effective? It turns that pen into a multitasker - doesn't require any more storage space. But the bottom line here is only you can decide, because there's no right or wrong answer. But using a tool just because you're supposed to, doesn't necessarily justify having it. Make sure that it is actually saving you time and effort.

Now, one of the most popular objections that I hear from moms is that it takes too much time to teach someone how to do something, or to find the person to do it, or even to learn how to use the new system or tool. The time it takes feels harder and we're tempted to think it's not worth that investment of time. But in reality, once those pieces of your team are fully functioning and operational, they will save you time and energy each and every time that that task is done or that tool is used. It is worth it. Just don't tackle them all at the same time. Do one at a time.

Recently, I've been talking about this idea of a mom team with a friend who moved to a new state. She comes from a large family and moving away from her siblings means she also left behind all her babysitters, her odd job helpers, her party planners and so on. She had a great team of people behind her and it wasn't really until she no longer had them that she realized how much she needed her mom team. Not only that, she began to understand how systems and tools are valuable members of her mom team and started looking at things differently. So the other day, she told me, "Oh, you'd be so proud of me. I used grocery delivery for the first time, I could hear you in the back of my head saying, 'use your team' and I remember you telling me the grocery delivery guy was part of my team." So that small decision that she made to lean into her mom team reduced her stress saved her time and it removed the disruption from her kids schedules meaning she got more done that was on her priority list.

So, let me ask you a question. Who's on your mom team? Shoot me an email or direct message me and let me know.

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